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Poker News Stories We Wish Were True

9 March 2011, By:
With dozens of poker sites regurgitating the same news every day, PokerJunkie has decided to take poker news to the next level (at least during slow news weeks).
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(Photo Credit under Creative Commons: eschipul)

With dozens of poker sites regurgitating the same news every day, PokerJunkie has decided to take poker news to the next level (at least during slow news weeks).

Meaning we're not just going to report on poker news that has actually happened - we're going to report on poker news that hasn't happened (but we wish did).

Expect to see more in this ongoing series. Or not.

Three weeks ago, the professional wrestling world was both shocked and elated when Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson returned after seven years to the WWE as the guest host of Wreslemania XXVIII.

On Wednesday, Johnson and the WWE made even more history when the WWE announced its partnership with the World Series of Poker.

In a press release, WWE Chairman Vince McMahon stated:

"For years the WWE has been the frontrunner in sports entertainment. Also, the WSOP has been the frontrunner in poker.

"The problem is that the WSOP lacked that extra 'ruthless aggression' needed to put it over the top. That is why we are here. It just made sense that we joined forces with the premier brand in the game of poker.

"I look forward to a long partnership with Caesars and the WSOP."

As part of the agreement, "The Rock" has agreed to do several promotional spots with different poker professionals. Of the new partnership, Johnson stated:

"For years, The Rock has been the most electrifying man in the world of sports and entertainment. Now, the Rock will layeth the smack down on the poker world as well.

"I look forward to meeting Phil Hellmuth. I hear that Hellmuth has been talking smack about the Rock. I might have to take my boot, shine it up real nice, and stick it straight up his candy ass "

Eleven-time WSOP champion Hellmuth was interviewed regarding the merger and stated "Seriously?  A wrestler is going to come into my world and try to take me on?

"You might be the people's champ in wrestling buddy, but I am THE champ when it comes to poker. You don't even know how to spell the word poker.

"In fact, being a wrestler, you're probably lucky if you can spell anything at all. So as you like to say, just bring it. IF you smell what I am cooking."

As part of the agreement with WWE, the WSOP will be prominently featured on both WWE programming and In addition, the WWE logo will be on display at the WSOP and there will be other promotional events.

Vince McMahon also stated that he would love to have a couple of pro players guest host Monday Night Raw, the companies premier program.

One of the big attractions at the WSOP this year will be a Diva's Jello match. The WSOP will hold a multi-table tournament that will allow one lucky player to wrestle with a WWE diva in Jello.

Jack Effel, Caesars VP and WSOP Tournament Director stated, "I am looking forward to this partnership. It is rare that we get the chance to be partnered with a product that is as globally recognized as the WWE.

"Also, I wouldn't mind meeting Kelly Kelly. Come to think about it, maybe I'll bend the rules a bit and participate in the Jello match tournament.

"There's always room for Jello, if you know what I mean."

Disclaimer: This article is not true. There is no partnership between the WWE and the WSOP, although that would be fun. None of the people in the article said any of those things. This article is strictly intended for entertainment purposes, whether you were entertained or not. Any use or rebroadcast without the explicit permission of PokerJunkie, compncards, and the underpants gnomes is strictly prohibited.

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