Lost in Poker Translation

After a nice run at the tables tonight, I thought I would give you, the poker junkie nation some common poker phrases and what they really translate to.

"I hate limit poker. I can never get people off of a hand."

What that really means is:

"I hate the fact I can't scare people out by throwing all of my chips in. I need to learn how to play the game properly and I refuse to do so?"

Board locked - The condition when no matter what card you opponent catches, he cannot outdraw you.

Prime Example: You sit down at a poker table to play some cash poker, looking for a fish, when Phil Ivey, Patrik Antonius, Ziigmund, Brian Townsend, Barry Greenstein, Daniel Negreanu, and Doyle Brunson all sit at your table. You are board locked. More like board f**ked if you ask me.

Boom!

Translation: Look at that miracle or that monster hand while I was all-in. Excuse me, I need hemorrhoid medication after removing that horseshoe out of my ass.

Quote from former WWE wrestler "The Godfather": It's time once again for everybody to hop aboard the HO TRAIN!

Translation: Doyle Brunson is a pimp. See above photo.